I do not know if everyone has this reaction when told that they need spectacles. I did. I smiled at the doctor and asked him- you don’t mean like everyday , every time right? And he (in specs!)  goes like “Yeah, pretty much. Not just reading glasses but full time spectacles cuz your left eye blaaa blaa blaa….” I wanted to hate him but he’s too likeable.

I have been having headaches everyday and it had become an object of concern so I checked other possible causes- pressure, stress ( I have actually been happier than I have been at home in years so it couldn’t be stress!), using the computer frequently? Maybe (I have not been on it full time!) but that’s not something I can stop!

So there! I need spectacles! And, they cost a fortune! Fuck! All the way home I kept thinking of how maybe I didn’t really need the spectacles- and maybe- just maybe, with the money still out there to be used, could I get me a camera? A Smartphone? Mend my analogue camera maybe?  My mother would have gone berserk if I suggested half the things I was thinking!

I later consoled myself that the glasses I had chosen looked quite nice. Con:  I will have to wear ’em all the damn time and I don’t like the geek look!i like it when people leave me alone. The geek look makes people want to poke you cuz somehow, maybe you won’t do anything. Shit! I think I will walk around in the specs, a dagger and a placard that says “KEEP THE FUCK OUTTA MY WAY! LEAVE ME ALONE!”

How do you stay fierce in goggles!

Well I do not want to have these headaches anymore and I do not want to be dependent on painkillers (though I tolerated that thought for a while. I still am. What could be so bad about painkillers anyway?)

At the end of the day, I do not want to let my eyes get so weak I will not be able to read my novels! Gosh, that would just be TRAGIC!  Therefore, I am grinning and bearing it. I keep telling myself- it’s not so bad. It could have been an inhaler, or chemo, or a tumor (God no!).

I am not feeling any better. Honestly, the biggest reason I will be wearing them will be cuz I feel sorry how much mum had to spend for em. I still don’t really think I need them.

Specs! Shit!



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