(i) touch and go

When I was young and we’d play with the estate kids at Sikujua Estate (Voi) we’d play a game called “Cha Kimama”. It’s basically playing House but some kids knew there was more to being daddy and mommy than just coming from work, cooking for the family or tending to the kids. Some kids knew parents fucked.

I knew parents fucked. I knew it from my mother the day I asked her where kids come from and she explained sex using words my small mind understood. I knew parents fucked to get kids, I just didn’t really understand what fucking involved.

Sex to me was when a boy brushed his penis against my clitoris. I had done that and it felt a little good so I figured it was why adults told us we shouldn’t do it. I could get pregnant or something.

I didn’t know sexual intercourse involved what I considered my pee hole until I got to class 4 and watched my first porn.

It was French. And the place it resumed playing from was in the middle of a penetration close-up. I think I froze in shock at what I was seeing, before I quickly ejected the tape and returned it where I’d found it.

Curiosity obviously won over eventually and I watched the whole of it, discovering that indeed, that thing had to go inside my vagina!

Just to see, I experimented sometime- pushing a finger inside my pee hole- and it hurt like a bitch!

Mills and Boon novels that had stories of virgins described the first time as a painful intrusion and then a surge of pleasure. Yet no matter how many times I overheard girls in high school speak of it like it was no biggie, I knew was that I was not ready to get over my fear of that pain. Sexual intercourse would have to wait a very long time. Novels would turn me on and so would more of the porn I would later get my hands on, but penetration was an absolute no!

My girlfriend in high school thankfully shared the same opinion and so when we’d sneak around groping each other, we’d stick only to our outer sexy parts. Thank heavens for boobs and the clitoris!

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