Second Times the Charm

Journal Dec 15th 2016 When the exam coordinator called me sometime this year, to tell me I could not graduate because my units were not in order, I had to sit on the step of our backdoor and take a breath before I was ready to listen to the reasons she had. I’m pretty sure…

Sweet Spots And Parachutes

I haven’t written for the longest time; even in my journal. I have been stable enough to not need to write and I decided I will only blog when the conditions are conducive for me to do so without worrying about my blog being inactive for a month or more.  Five years blogging simply because…

Journal: 1st December 2016

I haven’t been writing much even offline. My journal’s last entry must have been sometime in July when I was figuring myself out after my lowest low in years perhaps. I made a pact to try things out and I have been going at them and enjoying them when life isn’t busy wasting my efforts….

Journal: Sometime in November 2016

Since I got back to crafting about two months ago, I haven’t had a single threatening low. You know how they say, when you’ve reached rock bottom the only way to go is up? It’s like I had sunk to the sea bed of shitty feelings about existence, and now I was floating upwards finding…

Journal : August 9th 2016

I am all over the place right now. I experience bursts of such high energy and creative spurts followed by flat slumps of being a potato. I sleep 8 hours but sleep at 2 a.m which means I’m usually up at 10. I tried to undo this by starting to sleep early, only to end…

9 Years Sober

I haven’t thought seriously of suicide for about 9 years. I did about a month ago; all the way to a sure proof way to get it over with. The tipping point was the death of a child I knew only by association. And I am careful to just be there for people without being…

Lessons from My Niece

Journal: Jan 10th 2016 My niece woke up distressed today; both her parents were leaving for work and school and she wouldn’t be placated. She called and called and called till her voice was hoarse and her coughing resulted into near vomiting. And at last, exhausted, she sniffled for some time before her eyes begun…

When The Heart Demands Following

The year ended on a shitty note. This one begun on yet another shitty one; no surprise there. I’ve been so broke it’s hilarious and lucky for me, I’ve had friends give me fare, food and even pay up my contribution to a film venture whose production I was part of. I hate begging, but…

Nomadic Transitions

In the past one month, I have traveled to and from Nairobi more than six times for one reason or another. It’s been exhausting, I’ve had drama with shitty transportation and sleeping arrangements and I even had my menses descend upon me en route one time. Perfect timing uterus! It’s been hard getting anything done….

All I want For the New Year

Journal : December 29, 2015 (1134 hrs) I read this quote from a movie some years back: If you want to make god laugh, tell him your plans And it’s a good thing I don’t subscribe to the god idea anymore, otherwise that would have been another thing to be angry at and show the middle finger…

TEACHING POETRY TO KIDS

When Ngartia, this pal of mine called up to ask if I were up for teaching some kids poetry, I was super excited and instantly said yes. That was until I remembered that for one, kids are cruel beings; cruel in that they have not been taught to pretend and tell you nice things if…

MY FIRST NUDIE

I have always wanted to pose nude for art. Maybe because I am a nude photography enthusiast or because there is something open and fearless and self-accepting about letting the camera capture all your insecurities. For me it was my boobs. A friend once asked me “If you could go under the knife to change…