Crash and Burn

you are a child watching a birdie flapping it’s wings in the throes of death and it is your hope I cannot stand! When it all boils down I will fold; i will always choose death over life Don’t you know? I never sought to heal Only to crash and burn

Remember This

you must never cocoon me when i want to freefall nor cuff my wrists in place when i need both hands to write, to create, to strangle myself remember when the world claims that love holds fast and never let’s go remember this i am yours to love i am no one’s to keep  

An Other Way to Love

i need you to let me walk to the edge of a cliff knowing without a doubt that i will jump off and i need you to let me walk on without trying to stop me can you love me like this?

Death Wish

Sometimes I deliberately sabotage myself when I know deep down that I  do not want something. There’s a time I wasn’t exactly suicidal but I wasn’t high on life either; and each bus I would go into, travelling over long distances, I would not put on my seat belt. I would consciously remember that it is advisable to put it on but I…

9 Years Sober

I haven’t thought seriously of suicide for about 9 years. I did about a month ago; all the way to a sure proof way to get it over with. The tipping point was the death of a child I knew only by association. And I am careful to just be there for people without being…

To Eat My Cake and Have Yet Another Slice

Last year in December, I almost lost my mother to a home robbery with violence. The neighbors said they found her in a pool of her own blood and were shocked to find her still breathing. I never wanted to hear what exactly happened and each time my mum willingly recounted what had happened to…

How to Win at Love

Three ways In love That you’ll always lose One : to another Another being A man A thing An obsession A dream A chance rashly seized Two: to nothingness To the empty space Of a memory eternally lost Like worlds aged and enduring Swallowed entirely In one go By a single black hole Three and…


Is it so bad a thing To want to just sit here Lie here for days on end Until death takes me Each time, I think of a thing I deeply care about A minute later, it passes on Forgotten… Like walking away and never looking back Never even imagining What could have been Just…


Mum and dad reconciled when I was 8 years old and in class 3. We lived in Matuga back then and the place was fun for me, most of the time, because I had friends my age both from school and at home. Sundays were a great joy because of pretty Madam Irene who smelled…


Like the fact that Awful things do occur For no apparent reason So I learn too that Only the survivors Get to firmly claim How every calamity Is for a greater good and cause The deceased have no such opinions or testimonials


Of all things we may owe Our fellow human beings Do we owe them our lives? Save from needy young ones That we ourselves bring forth Do we owe our lives To any other Are these lives not our own To live and do As we please Choose what battles we may And retreat from…


They found him dead Among the flowers I’m told